I Am Not Okay

I have made leaps and bounds with my mental health and some of the good days that I have had lately have been absolutely amazing. I have experienced many moments of absolute clarity, when I feel invincible and I can see my path laid out before me. There is just one little problem and I am not okay because of this: the comedown from these moments. It is relentless and I have not been able to push it back.

The Comedown

When I am feeling good, I know exactly what I must do to take care of myself and put my mental health first. I understand the importance of seeing the comedowns for that which they really are – the bad with the good; nothing more and nothing less. I know that I should be thinking about the bigger picture and allowing these moments to pass but when it comes to it, I just cannot. I end up falling down into the pits again, my brain refusing to let me do anything. I have spent the majority of my time in my bed. I feel helpless and unable to move. I want to move so badly… but I can’t. I can’t bring myself to get up and do the things I know I need to do.

This has been and will continue to be the hardest, most debilitating and most soul crushing battle that I have ever had to fight. I want to keep fighting and I know I will; I am just losing the energy to keep it up. I cannot see how I am going to keep moving forward.

I hope that I see another light again soon so that I can continue the fight.

Love and Peace

Author: Tales of A Bearded Man

I am a mental health blogger, creating content like articles and videos in order to help people cope with things like depression and anxiety. My content is focused mainly around my own struggles and features ways that I personally have managed to cope. I hope that my hints and tips will inspire and help others to lead healthier lives. View all posts by Tales of A Bearded Man