Well, I’ve made another step towards managing my mental health. It’s not an easy one and I’m feeling very anxious about seeing it through: I made an appointment with my doctor.
This has been something that I’ve tried to do in the past but there was always something stopping it from happening; whether it was no appointments being available or my anxiety stopping me from pursuing it. I’ve generally been anxious about seeing my doctor recently, anyway. I don’t know why but I have a feeling it’s an extension of how I’ve been feeling the last couple of years, with my sudden change from being a happy-go-lucky guy to being a twisted, depressed sack of meat and bones.
I’ve never been great at taking medication. I think that’s because I haven’t been ill very often in my life and my body can generally fight off anything that’s thrown at it. Upon reflection, my anxiety in this particular situation may stem from that: knowing that there’s a high probability my doctor will prescribe anti-depressants. I have heard both good and bad things about them but to me they are quite scary. Not something I ever thought I would need to use.
This step that I took today in booking the appointment is a small one in the grand scheme of things. Although, it is a giant leap in terms of my progress. Here’s hoping that it helps.
Love and Peace.